Thursday, April 26, 2007

"GED" - Season 2

Earl is let down when his credit card application gets denied. He feels like a child and wants to take more responsibility for his life. Catalina suggests that if Earl feels like he screwed himself out of being an adult, he should put himself on the list.
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Earl decides to start becoming an adult by getting his GED from the local high school. Earl has trouble with the entire test. He decides to go back to his old high school teachers in hopes that they'll help them.
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Earl is saddened to find all of his old teachers had lost their enthusiasm for their jobs. It turns out that after Earl left school, the students became nastier and nastier to their teachers and the teachers were losing all hope. Earl offers to get through to the snot-nosed kids, knowing it's going to be a challenge.
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Earl's students refuse to pay attention to him in class, so he takes them to his motel to show them what happens to guys who goof off in school. He wants to get across to the students that school is important. They all come to the conclusion that Earl is a loser.
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Earl is touched when one of his students, Summer, comes to him for advice on how to avoid being a loser. In exchange, Summer helps Earl with his studying for the GED exam. It turns out that Summer set a trap for Earl. While he was getting tutored, the rest of the students flipped his car.
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Earl is so fed up with the students that he gathers the rest of the teachers to get revenge. The teachers start pulling pranks but their pranks backfire when one of the teachers accidentally blows up a student's car. Turns out that's what scared the students straight. The teachers are so relieved they invite Randy and Earl to attend classes, too. After attending all the necessary classes, Earl finally passes his GED exam.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

"Two Balls, Two Strikes" - Season 2

Only one person in town is capable of making people afraid from beyond the grave and that's Richard Chubby. The town's most powerful businessman was eccentric and unpredictable in life, not to mention mean. At his strip club, Chubby threatens Randy with a pistol. Luckily, it's filled with vodka, providing a good laugh and fatal grounds for confusion. Thinking he's freshening his drink, Chubby picks up the wrong gun and blows his own head off.
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There's a huge crowd at Chubby's funeral, because attendance for employees is mandatory, and the service is scheduled during their unpaid lunch break. Earl wonders why no one is leaving and Catalina informs him that the new boss is even worse. A white limo pulls up and the new boss gets out. Little Chubby, Chubby's son, is back in town to take over the family business.
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Before Little Chubby left town, his favorite hobby was messing with people, usually resulting in injury and/or humiliation. One day, Little Chubby cuts off Randy's rat-tail, stuffs it in Joy's drink, and forces her to swallow - or risk the loss of her hairdo. Joy wants Earl to kill him real slow - so he has to get creative. Donning an orange afro wig, Earl sneaks up on Little Chubby at The Crab Shack and kicks him in the nuts, drawing a standing ovation and high fives from the crowd.
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The day after the funeral, Earl visits Little Chubby at the strip club to fess up. Little Chubby thanks Earl for providing the turning point in his life. It was the pain in his heart to know that everyone hated him that Little Chubby couldn't shake. After walking the earth and visiting some aborigines, Little Chubby is now kinder and gentler. He thanks Earl for making him a better person.
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Now that Little Chubby's a whole new guy, everyone enjoys hanging out with him. He gives Randy a new rat-tail and invites the gang to the mansion for a pool party. Little Chubby's just happy to share with his friends. Earl still wants to do something to make up for what he's done, but it's going to be hard, since Little Chubby now has a perfect life. When Little Chubby's robe falls open, revealing his freakishly damaged little chubbies, Earl knows there's two giant problems.
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When Darnell suggests that Little Chubby's injury may have affected his libido, Earl accompanies him on a visit to the doctor. The doctor informs Earl that he has taken the jingle out of Little Chubby's Bells - he's no longer making testosterone. Earl stands by on the day of the big surgery. Little Chubby is scared and misses his Mom, who his father pushed out of a moving car. He asks Earl to fill in by holding his hand, stroking his hair, and singing him a Lynyrd Skynyrd song.
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Within a few days the testosterone starts flowing and Little Chubby's back to his old mean tricks. The gang tells Earl to fix the situation, so Earl goes by the strip club. Little Chubby offers Earl a drink, then smashes it against the back of Earl's head. When Earl comes to, he's tied to a backstop. Little Chubby has rigged up a pitching machine to deprive Earl of his manhood in a game of tit for tat.
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Earl reminds Little Chubby that he was happy being nice, and didn't want to end up like his Dad - sad and alone. After all, Little Chubby is his mother's son, too. When Earl starts singing "Free Bird," the softer side of Little Chubby finally comes out. He stands in front of Earl, taking the baseball hit, not to protect Earl, but to protect himself from himself. Once again deprived of his testosterone, Little Chubby reverts to the life of a nice guy and throws another pool party.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

"Harassed a Reporter" - Season 2

During another sleepless night alongside Randy, Earl watches TV news reporter Nicole Moses, who's been relegated to the "Up Before Dawn" show. Years before, Randy and Earl clowned around behind Nicole as she covered a meth lab explosion. The brothers gained notoriety with their "crazy arms" dance and embarked on a quest to harass Nicole during all her live reports.
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Nicole finally had a meltdown on camera, beating Randy and Earl with her microphone and sending her career down the tubes. Nicole is now Number 28 on Earl's list, so he and Randy visit her at the TV station. Nicole thinks she can redeem her career with a heartwarming story pulled from Earl's list and he promises to help.
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Now that he cares what people think, Earl is nervous to appear on camera, but Randy's excited to be on TV even though Nicole isn't interested in him. Earl closes his eyes and picks a story from his list - losing an important client for a business woman. When the woman turns out to be Patty, Nicole exclaims that she can't do a heartwarming story about a hooker.
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Earl comes up with a better story - he'll make up for the time he obliterated Earl Jr. and Darnell Jr.'s beloved playhouse with his El Camino. Nicole loves the idea of building the kids a new playhouse, but informs Randy that he won't appear on camera, because it's not his story.
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Dejected, Randy seeks solace from Joy, who advises him to break away from Earl and be his own man. Excited, Randy resolves to make a list of all the good things he's done and mess with those people while wearing a sombrero. Later, Earl and Catalina are shocked to see Randy doing a "crazy head" routine on Nicole's weather report.
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Randy arrives at the motel wearing a sombrero to get his own news story, and when he does, he's going to make sure Earl's a part of it, because that's something Earl wouldn't do. Earl apologizes, promising Randy that they'll build the new playhouse together.
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Nicole's not happy with Randy's participation, but Earl makes sure that Randy gets plenty of camera time. Later, everyone's at The Crab Shack to see Nicole's piece on the evening news. Nicole announces that Earl's heartwarming story is all about how he takes care of his mentally disabled brother, Randy. Embarrassed, Randy takes off.
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Randy runs to the TV station to confront Nicole. She explains that she had to make the story more interesting and all she did was make him look stupid on TV - just like he did to her, "it's karma." Earl offers to ask Nicole to re-edit the piece, but Randy is satisfied - karma finally noticed him. Using their crazy arms, the brothers cross Number 28 off the list together.